And the tire blew…

Among so many disappointing events of a tiring week (or would be weeks) of change, the tire had a flat.

Let me explain the reason for the surprise. My tire never punctures. I do not know. It’s a matter of luck, or maybe he’s always well calibrated, but yesterday he had a puncture, and that’s all I needed to burst into tears. I think my tire was my last straw. Perhaps a supernatural message telling me to retire. Maybe it’s also a big run of bad luck.

Moving house completely misaligns my chakras. I feel out of place, with no place to recharge and physically drained. And to make the change combo worse, ENEL is giving the work of a lifetime to reconnect the light here in the new house. It’s been 6 straight days without light, without a hot shower, cooking as you can in the dark, tripping over boxes, looking for small things in infinite messes. And you know how it is, you have to wait for the technician, ma’am, 12 hours a day, 5 working days, it can be any time, in the dark. Added to this are those psychosomatic symptoms of anxiety that the people of São Paulo know so well. Sinister junk.

It’s enough to drive anyone crazy. I swear I’m trying to take care of myself, even though I haven’t been able to eat very well lately. Trying to hold on to those little joys of adulthood. That smile, that hug. The warm one we love and who loves people too. What would we be without it? In the end, it is always our affections that save us. Pandemonium/flood/destruction of sodom and gomorrah may be happening or any other disaster of biblical proportions in people’s lives, but damn, it helps TOO much to go through them alongside partner people. Our network is everything.

Coming back to my tire, I think I’ll get this punctured camera, frame it, and put it on display here on one of the walls of the new house when everything around here calms down. She will be my reminder that situations, bureaucratic, horrible, and lengthy as they seem to be, are finite. Everything passes, people. It was just a flat tire. breathe. The light will come.

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